When he’s gone: my top 7 survival list (#6)

As the wife of a recently-minted doctor, I have already experienced long absences from my dearest.
I hear there are many more to come.

So what’s a wife to do?

Here I am compiling my top 7 survival list of what to do when he’s gone.

Survival Tip #6:
Chase him

Photo credit: WorldC News

That’s right.

If at all possible, get in your car, or on a plane, or (I guess) if you are really desperate you could strap on your running shoes….and follow him.

One of the best things I did during the months that the dear Dr. was gone was to take a weekend & visit him.
If he’s somewhere you can stay with him for free, all the better. But if not, “splurge” on a cheap hotel. It makes all the difference in the world to your marriage if you take some time to visit.

Now, I realize this isn’t always possible for a myriad of reasons.
But…if you can rearrange your life at all, I challenge you to try to find some time to go see him.

Painting credit: Henry Haley for Pearsons Magazine

You will both be glad you did.

Enjoy the journey!
~ Melissa

When he’s gone: My top 7 survival list (#7)

I recently had a dear friend whose husband is a fourth year medical student ask me to give some advice for those times when your husband is gone.

During our fourth year of medical school, the wonderful Dr. spent 3 months away (and that was in a 4 month span).
I am going to take time over the next few weeks writing about some of the ways to not only survive, but live with joy during these times.

Survival Tip #7:
Enjoy the women in your life (or find a few new ones to enjoy!)

God gave us people for a reason. Sometimes it gets so easy to lose sight of how important they are amidst all of the daily hassles. But it is so vital during this time to connect with other women, married or single, younger or older, who can help keep you company during the weeks that your dearest is away.

You might even ask one or two women to be particularly close at this time. Often people don’t really know how to help, and it’s great if you can give them a few ideas.
Ask a friend to:
1. Call you often & check up on you
2. Spend time praying with you and for you (sometimes it’s nice to know someone is on your side)
3. Have a once-a-week (or more) coffee time to laugh and…cry

Precious women who love us will bring great LIFE into the times when we are feeling alone.

If you are at a place where you don’t have very many women who are friends, look around. I almost guarantee that someone is in the same place you are. Make a few new friends. Invite them over to dinner or coffee. Invite several girls from church, your office, book club, or wherever out for a ladies night. If you take the first brave steps the rewards can be immense!

One quick note on this end, make sure that the friendships you are turning to when your husband is gone are female. These times can be a perfect trap of loneliness and distraction. Don’t make that great guy at your office your new confidant, don’t go grab coffee with the sweet man from church…

Love the man you are in covenant with by making wonderful women friends and enjoying their fellowship when he isn’t around.

What about you? Any precious women in your life that have been an encouragement? Where have you met them? How have you been intentional to stay connected?

I would love to hear from you!

Enjoying the journey,
~ Melissa